What Do You Do With A Drunken Pegasus? by Donraj
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“Buck me Fluttershy, you’ve got one sweet flank.”

Fluttershy blushed furiously as the blue pegasus with the prismatic mane stepped closer and continued

“Like, seriously, you could be on magazine covers!”

“I, uhm, was,” Fluttershy said quietly. At this range she could definitely smell the alcohol on Rainbow Dash’s breath. “I didn’t like it very much.”

Rainbow Dash waved a hoof excitedly. “No, I mean, like, magazines that ponies read. Big ones, like Cutie Marks Uncovered or Plotholes.

Fluttershy flattened her ears and cringed backwards. She looked about frantically, hoping one of her friends would see her predicament and intervene, but it seemed that Pinkie Pie was leading the other partygoers in a game of “pin the tail on the pony” and that nopony else was paying them any mind. She was on her own.

“Uhm, Rainbow Dash, I think you’ve had a little too much cider.”

“Nonsense!” Rainbow Dash said, slurring the word slightly. “I can handle way more than this. Hey, want to know a secret?”

“Sure?” Fluttershy said cautiously, not seeing any other options.

“Okay. Close your eyes.”

Fluttershy didn’t like where this was going. “I don’t know if that’s such a good idea.”

“Oh come on Fluttershy,” Rainbow Dash said with a roll of her eyes. That seemed to make her dizzy. “You’re no fun.”

“I just really don’t want to, if that’s okay with you.”

“Fine,” Rainbow Dash said in an exasperated tone. Then she leaned forward and kissed Fluttershy square on the lips.

“Mmppff!” Fluttershy squealed as she felt her friend’s mouth on hers. She started to pull away, but Rainbow Dash followed her. Her tongue slipped into the yellow pegasus’s mouth and…

That actually felt quite nice. Fluttershy stopped struggling and relaxed. Her eyes went unfocused and she felt Rainbow Dash’s hoof gently wrap itself around the back of her head. They held the pose for what seemed like a long time before Rainbow Dash came up for air. She looked at Fluttershy blearily and continued.

“Have I ever mentioned how important you are to me, Fluttershy?” Rainbow Dash asked. “Like, we’ve been friends a long time, an—and I know I’m kind of a dick sometimes, but you’re always there for me and you make me so happy.” She winked, or at least tried to, but it came out more as a wink with one eye and a half blink with the other. “I love you.”

Fluttershy’s mouth hung open slightly. She stammered a reply. “Dash, I don’t know what to say. This is so sudden, I mean…”

Rainbow Dash shook her head, probably more vigorously than she had intended. “I’ve always felt this way! Just, didn’t know how to say it. You’re so awesome and pretty and sweet and awesome. Celestia I want to just buck you senseless.”

Fluttershy’s wings poofed up and her face darkened to a color resembling Sweet Apple Acre’s signature product. “I, uhm, well, Dash I…”

Fluttershy struggled to think of a way to turn down the sudden expression of romantic interest, but then she found herself wondering if she really wanted to. Rainbow Dash was a good friend and always had been. She’d been her protector against bullies and frightening things ever since they’d both been fillies. And, she thought as she found herself eyeing her athletic friend’s beautifully toned body, Rainbow Dash wasn’t bad looking herself.

While all of that was rushing through Fluttershy’s head Applejack came trotting up. She took one look at Rainbow Dash and sighed.

“Ah knew giving you all that cider was a bad idea. Come on sugarcube, it’s time to get you back home.”

So saying she grabbed Rainbow Dash’s tail in her mouth and began hauling her away. Rainbow Dash struggled, or tried to at least, but all she managed to accomplish was tripping and falling flat on her face. She complained noisily.

“Hey, I’m a grown mare and I can drink as much as I want! Let go of me!”

Applejack sighed and ignored her. More desultory resistance ensued, followed by Rainbow Dash looking back at Fluttershy and shouting, “Call me!”

And then she was gone. Fluttershy stood stock-still. What the hay had just happened?

 

--

 

Fluttershy watched as Rainbow Dash went through a series of warm-up moves in the sky above the field. A warm-up for Rainbow Dash anyway; Fluttershy was pretty sure she would have hurt herself trying to do any of those maneuvers herself. As she watched Rainbow Dash stopped and hovered about ten feet above her, still trying to get her blood pumping enough to banish the hangover from the night before. Fluttershy blushed slightly as she caught herself staring at the fascinating view of her friend’s body from this angle. Finally Rainbow Dash decided that she was warmed up enough and called out to the pink maned pegasus.

“You ready to do your part?”

“Yes ma’am!” Fluttershy said in an unusually chipper voice, even going so far as to give a mock salute. Rainbow Dash gave her an odd look, then shrugged and jetted upward to begin a series of highly acrobatic moves. Fluttershy failed to notice the look and felt herself fighting the urge to dance excitedly in place. Her best friend since she was a filly was interested in her! She gave a giddy squeal as Rainbow Dash started her routine.

It was good performance all in all, especially given that Rainbow Dash spent the night before snoring in Applejack’s barn because she’d been too drunk to fly home. As Rainbow Dash reached the finale of the show Fluttershy tensed her legs and sprung up in the air shouting, “Yay!”

Rainbow Dash landed not far away. She grabbed a towel to wipe the sweat off her coat as Fluttershy pranced up, practically humming with joy. Rainbow Dash gave her a cocky smile.

“Looks like I’m not the only one who’s been practicing. That was some great cheering, Fluttershy!”

Fluttershy beamed. “Only the best for my best friend,” she said, giving Rainbow Dash a quick peck on the cheek. She drew back smiling, expecting Rainbow Dash to do the same, but instead the prismatic maned pony gave her a confused look.

“Uhm, what was that?” Rainbow Dash asked.

Fluttershy found herself stammering, her newfound confidence evaporating like morning dew. “Uhm, well I just thought, you know, since we’re, uhm, I…you look great today!”

Rainbow Dash continued to stare. “Well thanks, but why the…oh.” Comprehension dawned on her face. She took a deep breath, suddenly feeling awkward. “Look Fluttershy, I’m really flattered, but you know I’m not into mares.”

Fluttershy felt the bottom fall out of her stomach. “But you said, I thought, I mean—“

Rainbow Dash sighed. “Look, how many times do I have to say it? This is my natural mane color. It’s not a statement and it doesn’t mean anything.”

Fluttershy felt herself shrinking back. Her gaze was drawn irresistibly downward. “But I—“

Rainbow Dash shook her head and tossed the towel over her back. “Honestly Fluttershy, I expected better from you of all ponies,” she said in annoyance. “Look, let’s just forget this happened and move on. No hard feelings.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Fluttershy whispered, eyes downcast. Rainbow Dash took off and flew away towards home and a nice shower. Fluttershy was left alone, eyes burning.

 

“But…I thought you wanted to be with me?”


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